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Spring has Sprung

Lilo at the park!

All tired out

More photos here

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Positive Affirmation

Remember to use positive affirmations. I am not a dork is not one of them.

That was from today’s Story of the Day from Story People I buy a lot of cards from this guy and frame them. I like art that is goofy and sometimes makes me cry or laugh.

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The Sensation of Spinning

This morning I was in the basement doing laundry when this horrible dizziness hit. At first I was like, that’s weird then I was gripping the washing machine so I wouldn’t fall over. I called John and he found me on the floor. Such a lovely way to start the day. All in all I have had 4 bouts of Vertigo today.
It’s a freaky feeling. It reminds me of when I was 15-16 years old and would get drunk and come home wasted and try to stop the bed spins and pass out on my very wavy waterbed. My mom was a smart woman. What’s the best way to punish your drunk teenager? She would stand over me and make the bed sway so I felt like I was on a boat in a hurricane while saying “who’s the big grown up now!”. Evil woman.
But I toughed it out and went to work. The interesting part of today was hearing people’s theories on what was causing it. I think it tells a lot about a person’s fears and current concerns.
John was annoyed that he had to drive.
My mother and Kristen both said I was pregnant.
JP thinks I have diabetes
Chris thinks it’s from last nights cocktails. He thinks nothing good can come from Malibu Rum.
The logical part of me thinks stress. The hypocondriac in me says heart trouble, brain tumor, cancer, diabetes, pregnancy, alien abduction…I can go on.
Speaking of alien abduction..when I worked on the railroad one of my co-workers was this hot, bad ass biker who was convinced that he had been abducted several times. He would wake up naked in corn fields miles from anywhere with scratches all over his body. Anyway.
So we’ll see if this is as bad tomorrow. I hate dealing with crap like this so hopefully I won’t have to go into the doctors office.

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Tonight’s Cocktail Is….

Malibu Rum with this Italian Blood Orange Soda. What makes it special? The Wonder Woman Glass!
I also got some lovely new flowers from Trader Joe’s today so here’s a shot of the flowers, my booze and some Playmobil toys just for the hell of it.

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My Hips Don’t Lie-Gina & Lisa Bye Bye

How random was the Shakira performance? GASP! Katherine in the bottom 3?! I was just thinking how cool it was that she had the humility to look nervous when she was sitting next to Bucky! This is what I get for not voting. And this is what she gets for crappy fashion sense.
Now I am forced to watch bad commercials while waiting for the final result. My prediction is Lisa going home. But what if it’s a horrible lapse of judgement on behalf of the american people and my girlfriend goes home? See. This is why I watch the show. I love the suspense. Oh my god she’s in the bottom 2! What is wrong with you people!!! That’s it Katherine goes home I quit watching. For real. America’s Next Top Model got it right and sent Duh-Gina home and that’s great. She was a moron. Wait. Did the powers behind Idol put McPhee in the bottom to scare more people into voting? I am terrified. I guess that’s putting it too strongly. Whew. Lisa going home. It was too close for me. Time to start voting. Pickler in the top 5 and McPhee in the bottom two. Paris don’t cry those crocodile tears. You know the Lisa votes are heading straight to you. You two were splitting the we like 16 year old black girl vote. You notice Pickler ain’t shedding no tears. The soul-less don’t cry.

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American Idol-so wrong in so many ways

First, I remember some big fuss (not to be confused with Hot Fuss which is a great album from the Killers) about Kelly Clarkson not allowing her songs to be used on the show. Too bad she hadn’t stuck to her guns because Lisa really should have chosen a different song. When you are living in the bottom 3 you do not try to take on the only real Idol out there.
Kelly Pickler SUCKS. What’s with the hoedown kick? Did she learn nothing from Ashley Simpson? Hoe downs do not cover the fact that you SUCK. Get ready for your Playboy pictorial because that’s about as famous as you’re going to get. And then daddy’s prison mates will have something to “look at”.
Dear Ace-Nothing about Train shows a little bit more of a rock edge. And please stop acting out the lyrics-touching your hair when he says hair, fondling your scar on the permanent scar line. Is that scar from when they removed your soul?
Taylor is losing weight and has a good hair cut. I can’t bring myself to say anything nasty about my potential boyfriend. I say potential because I am not sure where we stand after the last two performances.
Mandiva-Jesus does not win Idol. You can thank him all you want when you win, but first you have to pick songs that people like and can sing along with it. Why didn’t you sing some Mary J Blige No More Drama? Same theme, less preachy. But can you tell me where you got your sparkly jeans? Us fat chicks have to stick together.
Chris D-nice cover on the finally giving Live credit for your Walk The Line version. I am sick to death of your howling/growling. What If you started to show some range? What if you tried to challenge yourself?
What if Katharine McPhee fired her stylist? What the fuck was she wearing tonight? Is it a Star Trek uniform? I was waiting for them to beam her up.
Bucky-hate the hat. But you sounded a little saucy tonight. EEW. I feel a little dirty.
Paris-did you steal Pickler’s yellow tube top from last week? Nice ass shaking but boring song.
Elliot-Midwest Melissa once held hands with Gavin Degraw. Anyway. Elliot you look like Beastie Boy but you need to get some better song selections.

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It Ain’t Easy Being a Corporate Whore

Hi Ho Kermit the Frog,

Why did you turn into such a corporate whore?

You used to be a serious journalist, giving hard hitting interviews to nursery rhyme characters on Sesame Street. Then came your big break on the Muppet Show. You were a great stage manager, a leader among your fellow muppets. You managed to stay on top even after your show was cancelled. You were a best selling author, an enviromentalist, a regular guest on Hollywood Squares. OK that may not have been your finest hour but it was good, honest work! Nothing like this new ad campaign. I know Miss Piggy is pimping for Pizza Hut but we never expected much from her. She has always made it clear that she was in it for “moi” as she likes to say. But you Kermit. From you we expected something more. Instead you hooked up with Walt Disney and sold your soul and our childhood memories to the devil in mouse ears. Shame on you Mr. Frog, shame on you.

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The Sea Made Her Feel Alive

You all know that I love sharks and am fascinated by shark attacks.
This one happened well over a year and a half ago but something about Tyna Webb has always stuck with me. She seemed like such a kind, beautiful and spiritual woman. Her nephew wrote this amazing tribute to her and I won’t try to downplay the fact that it meant something to me. I am inspired by this woman and how she lived her life. I like the kindness and compassion. I like the full moon parties in her apartment overlooking the sea. It was a horrible death but is seemed she had a fulfilling life. And I can’t help but put this in because it’s kind of creepy. If you search Tyna Webb in google images you get these great photos of her and then all these shots of great whites leaping out of the water. All the great things she’s done and she’ll forever be tied to the way she died. But then again, if she had died of natural causes we would never know about her!

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